Week Thirty-One: Holiday Tunes - Tori Amos - "Winter" - Little Earthquakes

Although this is more of a seasonal tune rather than a holiday tune, I'm still throwing it into the mix this week. This one reminds me of my dad, which would make complete sense, because Tori Amos wrote it for her father. For most of my life, my dad had always asked me when I was going to start loving myself as much as he loved me. His sentiments were perfectly mirrored in this song.

My father and I had an extremely rocky relationship when I was growing up. When I was much, much younger, I was his shining little sports and academic star --- I'm a nerd; I own it!!! Then, when I realized that he was an alcoholic, I really could not stand him and wanted nothing to do with him. However, it is interesting to me that this song was released in 1992, the same year that my dad sobered up. In fact, he will be celebrating 20 years of sobriety on Saturday, December 8, 2012 --- unbelievable --- and thank you, dad!!!

Regardless, our relationship became incredibly strained when I spent six years of my life with the biggest @sshole in the universe. At that point, my dad wanted nothing to do with me. However, when my dad rescued me, not once but twice, from that situation and told me that he had brought his firearm and was ready to use it on my ex and to go to prison for the rest of his life, it finally sunk in that he sincerely and unconditionally loved me... and believe me, the threat would have been considered completely justifiable from any father's point of view... and that's all I'm going to say about that!!!

One year, I made my family members a CD of songs for Christmas that reminded me of each of them, and I put this song on my dad's CD. I don't think he cared for Tori Amos at first, but the song eventually grew on him.

About a year ago, I received an email from him with a youtube link and a message that said: “Every time I hear this song, I think of you...” It was “Sweet Child O' Mine” by Guns N' Roses. I love my daddy! We get along like gangbusters now!!!

Snow can wait

I forgot my mittens

Wipe my nose

Get my new boots on

I get a little warm in my heart

When I think of winter

I put my hand in my father's glove

I run off

Where the drifts get deeper

Sleeping beauty trips me with a frown

I hear a voice

"You must learn to stand up for yourself

Cause I can't always be around"

He says

When you gonna make up your mind

When you gonna love you as much as I do

When you gonna make up your mind

Cause things are gonna change so fast

All the white horses are still in bed

I tell you that I'll always want you near

You say that things change my dear

Boys get discovered as winter melts

Flowers competing for the sun

Years go by and I'm here still waiting 

Withering where some snowman was

Mirror mirror where's the crystal palace

But I only can see myself

Skating around the truth who I am

But I know dad the ice is getting thin

When you gonna make up your mind

When you gonna love you as much as I do

When you gonna make up your mind

Cause things are gonna change so fast

All the white horses are still in bed

I tell you that I'll always want you near

You say that things change my dear

Hair is grey

And the fires are burning

So many dreams

On the shelf

You say I wanted you to be proud of me

I always wanted that myself

When you gonna make up your mind

When you gonna love you as much as I do

When you gonna make up your mind

Cause things are gonna change so fast

All the white horses have gone ahead

I tell you that I'll always want you near

You say that things change

My dear
Never change...