Okay, here goes... my very first year of teaching, I had a student in my homeroom named Devin. Devin was an amazing young lady. She played almost every sport that the school offered. She had a quirky sense of humor. She sang in choir, and she was on my speech team. Devin was also an aspiring actress, and we were working on her audition piece to get into Booker T. Washington.
Devin went home one Friday afternoon... and she never came back. That Sunday night, she died from pneumonia. Her parents knew she was ill, and they even took her to one of those facilities that administers care on the weekends. However, they had no idea how ill she truly was until she began coughing up massive amounts of blood. By then, it was too late.
I remember the principal coming to my room before the students arrived and telling me the news. I also remember her instructing me to act as if nothing was wrong until the priest arrived to tell the students. I was in shock that she would even request such a thing of me. I looked her straight in the eyes and said, "I have done everything that you have asked of me this year without question, but this is one thing that I cannot and will not do. You must get someone to come sit with my class and let me have some time to process what you have just told me." Fortunately, she was very accommodating.
I cannot even begin to express in words what it was like to sit in my classroom and hear the priest reveal to my homeroom students that Devin was never coming back. It was like time stopped, and everything began to move in slow motion. It's difficult enough for adults to deal with death and loss, but that year, there were 78 students in the 8th grade... and we had to attend to all of their needs... at once.
I have been to many funerals over the years, but I have never felt the same feeling of emptiness that I felt when I had to partake in the funeral of a 14-year-old girl. One of her classmates, who had the most beautiful voice, sang this song at the funeral. If you know anything about the Catholic faith and traditions, it is a big no-no to sing secular songs during religious ceremonies, but the priest was amazing and was willing to overlook it for the sake of Devin and her grieving classmates.
It took us weeks to get back to a routine that felt even close to being normal, but we never got over the loss...
I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
I'm so tired but I can't sleep
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can't be heard
I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
I'm so afraid to love you, but more afraid to lose
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light
And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Weep not for the memories
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