Post #613: Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons - "Opus 17 (Don't You Worry 'Bout Me)" - The Very Best of Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons

I am so utterly relieved that the holidays are just about behind us...  most wonderful time of the year my arse!!! 

However, all was not wasted this holiday season because I did finally have the pleasure of catching a live performance of Jersey Boys.  You might recall that I mentioned in a post about Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons from way back in February of 2014 that it was my intention to see the show the next time it passed through town, and last night, I did just that.  I have to say that, hands down, Jersey Boys has now secured the #1 spot of my all-time favorite musicals.  It was truly phenomenal from start to finish, but I had no idea that it had so much foul language and vulgarity... yikes!  Regardless, I sat there mesmerized throughout the performance.  I laughed quite a bit... I teared up at times.  Heck, I even braved the tornadoes that passed through Dallas last night, as well as the flooded streets, because nothing, but nothing, was going to keep me from seeing it.  I've already made quite a few posts about Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons, so I had to opt for today's tune because it was not one that I have included thus far.

Another holiday tradition for me is to make sure that Angelica, Granny, and De have some type of Christmas celebration full of gifts, surprises, and special treats.  Angelica and I have been matched through Big Brothers Big Sisters for going on eight (8) years now.  Unfortunately, I was not able to hook up with Angelica & her family before Christmas; so today was the big day!  The absolute highlight was helping Granny purchase De's senior class ring.  Granny asked me if she could get it engraved on the inside with the words: "Granny's Love".  How could I turn down a simple request like that?!?!  For a mere additional $8, her engraving wish was granted, and she broke down into tears right there in the store.  (I've included some pics below for those of you who have been keeping up with this yearly event.)

 (Angelica's treasures from her shopping spree)

(Granny's warm pajamas, which is the only thing she ever requests)

 (What De's senior class ring will look like when it arrives in 6 weeks)

 (Granny's engraving request)

Finally, inspired by not only last night's trip to the Winspear Opera House, but also by my outing to see The Brian Setzer Orchestra a few weeks back, I've decided to take myself to the Dallas Symphony Orchestra's New Year's Eve performance, which they are advertising as a night of "Viennese-inspired revelry".  I was able to score Row A, Seat Number One, in the Orchestra Terrace.  Now, before you get all impressed by the location of the aforementioned ticket and wonder how in the world I was able to afford such a seat, might I remind you that one of the benefits of being a "party of one" is that once there are only single seats available, they become substantially discounted; so what was originally a $99 ticket was discounted down to $29 since it was the only remaining spot in said Orchestra Terrace, and I happily snatched it up! Therefore, I will include the tune with which I will be ending 2015 and ringing in 2016 --- behold, Strauss' "On the Beautiful Blue Danube"...

Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia

Oh I can see
There ain't no room for me-
You're only holding out your heart in sympathy.
If there's another man
Then girl I understand.
Go on and take his hand
And don't you worry 'bout me.

Oh I'll be blue
And I'll be crying too-
But girl you know I only want what's best for you.
What good is all my pride
If our true love has died?
Go on and be his bride
And don't you worry 'bout me.

I'll be strong.
I'll try to carry on.
Although you know it won't be easy when you're gone.
I'll always think of you
The tender love we knew.
But somehow I'll get through
So don't you worry 'bout me.

Ooooooooooh bay-ay-by.

Sweetie pie
Before you say goodbye
Remember if he ever leaves you high and dry
Don't cry alone in pain
Don't ever feel ashamed
If you want me again
Just don't you worry 'bout me.

I love you
No matter what you do
I'll spend my whole life waiting if you want me to.
And if this is goodbye
You know I'd rather die
Then let you see me cry-
'Cause then you'd worry 'bout me. 

 I'll be strong.
I'll try to carry on.
Although you know it won't be easy when you're gone.
I'll always think of you
The tender love we knew.
But somehow I'll get through

 So don't you worry 'bout me.

Post #612: Michael Penn - "No Myth" - March

Thank heavens that books are rarely ever as disappointing as most people ultimately turn out to be... And is it 2016 yet???  I really need this crappy year to be over and done!!!  In the meantime, enjoy this lovely, little tune from Michael Penn with references to Romeo (Shakespeare) and Heathcliff (Bronte)...

Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia 

So, she says it's time she goes
But wanted to be sure I know
She hopes we can be friends

I think, yeah, I guess we can say I
But didn't think to ask her why
She blocked her eyes and drew the curtains
With knots I've got yet to untie

What if I were Romeo in black jeans
What if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth
Maybe she's just looking for
Someone to dance with

See, it was just too soon to tell
And looking for some parallel
Can be an endless game

We, we said goodbye before hello
My secrets she will never know
And if I dig a hole to China
I'll catch the first junk to Soho

What if I were Romeo in black jeans
What if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth
Maybe she's just looking for
Someone to dance with

Sometime from now you'll bow to pressure
Some things in life you cannot measure by degrees
I'm between the poles and the equator
Don't send no private investigator to find me please
'Less he speaks Chinese
And can dance like Astaire overseas, okay

What if I were
What if I was
Maybe she's just looking for
Someone to dance with

What if I were Romeo in black jeans
What if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth
Maybe she's just looking for
Someone to dance with

Post #611: Metric - "Help I'm Alive" - Fantasies

Heard this one on Pandora earlier... felt like sharing it... not much else to say...

Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia

I tremble
They're gonna eat me alive
If I stumble
They're gonna eat me alive
Can you hear my heart
Beating like a hammer
Beating like a hammer

Help I'm alive
My heart keeps beating like a hammer
Hard to be soft
Tough to be tender
Come take my pulse the pace is on a runaway train
Help I'm alive
My heart keeps beating like a hammer
Beating like a hammer

If we're still alive
My regrets are few
If my life is mine
What shouldn't I do?
I get wherever I'm going
I get whatever I need
While my blood's still flowing
And my heart's still
Beating like a hammer
Beating like a hammer

Help I'm alive
My heart keeps beating like a hammer
Hard to be soft
Tough to be tender
Come take my pulse the pace is on a runaway train
Help I'm alive
My heart keeps beating like a hammer
Beating like a hammer

If we're still alive
My regrets are few
If my life is mine
What shouldn't I do?
I get wherever I'm going
I get whatever I need
While my blood's still flowing
And my heart's still
Beating like a hammer
Beating like a hammer
Beating like a hammer
Beating like a hammer

Help I'm alive
My heart keeps beating like a hammer

Post #610: The Smiths - "Unloveable" - Louder Than Bombs

So when life places me in a choke hold, slams my face into the ground, and knocks the wind out of me yet again, the only thing I even know to do anymore is to put on The Smiths, make a cup of hot tea, and cry myself to sleep, thinking about how sad this world and its people truly are...

So, my dearest Morrissey, sing to me in the way that only you know how...


Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia

Oh ...
I know I'm unloveable
You don't have to tell me
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours
Oh ...

I know I'm unloveable
You don't have to tell me
Oh, message received
Loud and clear
Loud and clear
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours

I know I'm unloveable
You don't have to tell me
For, message received
Loud and clear
Loud and clear
Message received
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours

I wear black on the outside
'cause black is how I feel on the inside
I wear black on the outside
'cause black is how I feel on the inside

And if I seem a little strange
Well, that's because I am
And if I seem a little strange
Well, that's because I am

But I know that you would like me
If only you could see me
If only you could meet me

Oh ...
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours
I don't have much in my life
But take it - it's yours
Mmm ...
Oh ...

Post #609: The Go-Go's - "Turn to You" - Talk Show

So, I had started Belinda Carlisle's memoir, titled Lips Unsealed, ages ago, and I had intended to finish reading it while I was on vacation in Galveston.  However, as I was trying to complete it, I realized that I was having trouble remembering who any of the people were that she kept mentioning over and over.  I realized that it would benefit me to start the whole thing from the beginning, and I'm pleased that I did because I caught so many details that I had missed during the first attempt.  I'll include a photo of the cover below:

I never considered myself a huge fan of The Go-Go's when I was growing up.  I liked them for sure, but I think that seeing The Bangles open for George Michael at my very first concert when I was in the 5th grade definitely allowed The Bangles to win the #1 '80s girl group spot in my heart over The Go-Go's.

Regardless, Belinda Carlisle's memoir was fairly intense.  It amazes me how individuals who have the world handed to them on a silver platter can be so downright miserable, but I see it before my very eyes on a daily basis.  Poor Belinda claims that she didn't even truly find peace of mind and a sense of self-worth until she was almost fifty-years-old... better late than never, right?!?!

Today, I'm including two of my favorites from The Go-Go's --- "Turn to You" and "Unforgiven".  Interestingly, in the memoir, Belinda mentions that Billie Joe Armstrong from Green Day helped to co-write the song, which makes sense due to the fact that it was one of their later releases in 2001.  Ha!  It's kind of awesome that they mention the word "thanksgiving" in the lyrics, and it's Thanksgiving week... where did this year go??? Additionally, I've already posted about my favorite Belinda tune, "Mad About You", so I'll include one of my other favorites called "Leave A Light On"... enjoy!

Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia

 

You act so tough
But I know what you're doing
You think falling in love
Means falling to ruin
You build your walls so high
You act your life out all alone
You don't want to let me see
That your heart's not made of stone

[Chorus:]
There may be some explanation
Why you feel the way you do
The world makes its rotations
But I just want to turn to you
Come on let me turn to you
Please let me turn to you
Why not let me turn to you
Just want to turn to you

It has a lot to do
With the first time that we met
The wild dance in your eyes
Made up for what was never said
Gotta get my message
Stop spending all our precious time
Because before you know it
We'll be down to our last dime

 

[Chorus]

 

 

 

 

 

Post #608: Iron & Wine - "Such Great Heights" - Such Great Heights EP

It's been awhile since I've posted... hopefully that has given you all plenty of time to miss me.  Speaking of missing someone, I'm sure you'd all agree with me that there are times that it can become absolutely torturous (along with plenty of other things that are equally torturous, but maybe those can be addressed in their own separate posts some day). Anyhow, this song came on my Pandora station this morning, and although I'm not really sure what the intended meaning truly is, it always makes me think about missing someone.

Of course, the original version is by The Postal Service (which I will include below the lyrics); however, I love this acoustic version by Iron & Wine much, much more (which is a bit odd since I tend to love synthesizers so much)!  Iron & Wine's version also appeared on the soundtrack for the film, Garden State, which I mentioned when I posted about The Shins. 

Another song by Iron & Wine that also shows up on my Pandora station quite frequently that I've also grown quite fond of is "Flightless Bird American Mouth", so I'll share that one with you today too!

Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia

I am thinking it's a sign
That the freckles in our eyes
Are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned

And I have to speculate
That God himself did make
Us into corresponding shapes
Like puzzle pieces from the clay

And true, it may seem like a stretch,
But its thoughts like this that catch
My troubled head when you're away
When I am missing you to death

When you are out there on the road
For several weeks of shows
And when you scan the radio,
I hope this song will guide you home

They will see us waving from such great heights,
"Come down now," they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
"Come down now," but we'll stay...

I tried my best to leave
This all on your machine
But the persistent beat it sounded thin
Upon listening

And that frankly will not fly.
You will hear the shrillest highs
And lowest lows with the windows down
When this is guiding you home

They will see us waving from such great heights,
"Come down now," they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
"Come down now," but we'll stay...

They will see us waving from such great heights,
"Come down now," they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
"Come down now," but we'll stay...

They will see us waving from such great heights,
"Come down now."
They will see us waving from such great heights,
"Come down now."

Post #607: Keane - "Somewhere Only We Know" - Hopes and Fears

So it's definitely that time of year again when I resume my soul-quenching, meditational walks around White Rock Lake.  With the help of my Pandora mix, I am seriously in nothing less than pure bliss.  There is so much beauty to take in from nature if you ever slow down enough and allow yourself time to enjoy such.  Instead of walking at a quicker exercise-worthy pace, I took more of a leisurely stroll and killed almost two hours today watching the sail boats and the various wildlife.  It was also a bit warmer today than I had hoped, so the slower pace was perfect for my first time back in months.

I've been meaning to post about today's song at various times in the past, but for some reason, another song always seemed to win out.  Now that I'm no longer limiting myself to one day of posting per week, I finally got around to sharing this tune with you.  It's one of those songs that gives me warm fuzzies every time I hear it... kind of like snuggling up into cozy sheets fresh out of the dryer like I'm about to do here shortly!

So, as I was walking around the lake today, this tune came on my Pandora station.  I haven't really ever shared my time at White Rock Lake with anyone (other than Pixie), so there's really no "we" to reminisce about with regard to this song and that location.  I suppose that I'm just getting a bit giddy about the fact that, in a few short months, I will no longer be driving to my beloved site... instead, it will be just a matter of a simple walk down a nature trail to get to the lake.  And despite the fact that I spent yet another weekend alone, I'm happy to now admit that I'm more open to the idea of one day having a "we" to potentially think/reminisce about while listening to today's song and possibly even invite to the lake with me... enjoy!

Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia 

I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches of it looking at me
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know?

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go?
So why don't we go?

Ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah

This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know?

Post #606: The Shins - "New Slang" - Oh, Inverted World

So, I've owned the film, Garden State, for years and years now, but I finally got around to watching it a few weeks ago.  I wasn't terribly impressed by the film, but it wasn't awful either.  There is a scene where Sam, the lead female character, says to Andrew, the lead male character: "You gotta hear this one song — it’ll change your life; I swear."

I can't assert that listening to this song changed my life, by any means, but I do really like it!

I often enjoy seeing if I can find the intended meaning behind a song from the perspective of the individual who wrote it.  Wikipedia claims the following with regard to the meaning of the song according to lead singer, James Mercer:

"The song was born out of frustration regarding his personal life and future. 'It's definitely a moment in my life, that sort of angst and confusion about what my future was going to be,' he remarked."

Life can be and definitely has been quite frustrating, but I feel like good things, amazing things even, are on the horizon for me.  I can't explain it exactly, but it's just a feeling that I have.  For the first time, I don't even feel scared about whatever changes my future may hold for me.  Despite my tough girl facade and the air of confidence with which I carry myself, I tend to be afraid of everything!!!  Regardless, as a result of a recent chain of events, I do know that having someone to go through this crazy world with would be way more fun and a definite source of comfort, but I'm also not frightened to go it alone if that's how it ends up happening for me...  I'll just continue to figure it out as the days unfold, I suppose.

I know that the upcoming move I intend to make will be very refreshing for me.  I cannot wait to have White Rock Lake as my back yard!!!  Being near bodies of water is so comforting to me.  Scorpios are water signs, right?  That totally makes sense! 

Enough rambling for now... 'cause it's time for you to hear the song that will "change your life" ;-)

Until next time...

XOXOXO

Anastasia 

Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth
Only, I don't know how they got out, dear
Turn me back into the pet I was when we met
I was happier then with no mind-set

And if you took to me like a gull takes to the wind
Well, I'd 'a jumped from my trees
And I'd a danced like the king of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well

New slang when you notice the stripes, the dirt in your fries
Hope it's right when you die, old and bony
Dawn breaks like a bull through the hall
Never should have called
But my head's to the wall and I'm lonely

And if you took to me like a gull takes to the wind
Well, I'd 'a jumped from my trees
And I'd a danced like the king of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well

Godspeed, all the bakers at dawn
May they all cut their thumbs
And bleed into their buns 'til they melt away

I'm looking in on the good life I might be doomed never to find
Without a trust or flaming fields, am I too dumb to refine?
And if you took to me like
Well I'd a danced like the queen of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well

Post #605: The xx - "Stars" - xx

The band, The xx, has been showing up a lot on my Pandora mix lately.  I'm not sure which of my original band selections they are tied to exactly, but it shouldn't surprise anyone that I like them quite a bit if you read about their influences on Wiki:

"The band has cited several artists in their influences: singer Romy Madley Croft has mentioned her liking for Jimi Hendrix, The Slits, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Joy Division, Yazoo, Eurythmics, New Order and The Cure."

I highly doubt that I'm the only one who expected the song "Psycho Killer" by the Talking Heads to follow the opening bass line to today's selection, but it does throw me off a bit when the piano keys kick in, as opposed to the drums.  I really thought it was just a live version of "Psycho Killer" the first time I ever heard the opening.

The second tune I selected for you today is a bit reminiscent of The Radio Dept.  You might recall me mentioning them when I posted about the Marie Antoinette Soundtrack.

Both tunes make me wish for a lazy, rainy day of lounging in bed... I can't wait for the dreary autumn days that are right around the corner.  I can sense a change in the air... it feels nice!

Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia

I can give it all on the first date
I don't have to exist outside this place
And dear, know that I can change

But if stars shouldn't shine
By the very first time
Then dear it's fine, so fine by me
'Cause we can give it time
So much time with me

And I can draw the line on the first date
I'll let you cross it
Let you take every line I've got
When the time gets late

But if stars shouldn't shine
By the very first time
Then dear it's fine, so fine by me
'Cause we can give it time
So much time with me

If you want me, let me know
Where do you wanna go?
No need for talking, I already know
If you want me, why go?

If you want me, let me know
Where do you wanna go?
No need for talking, I already know
If you want me, why go?

I can give it all on the first date
I don't have to exist outside this place
And dear, know that I can change

But if stars shouldn't shine
By the very first time
Then dear it's fine, so fine by me
'Cause we can give it time
So much time with me

But if stars shouldn't shine
By the very first time
Then dear it's fine, so fine by me
'Cause we can give it time
So much time with me

Post #604: Regina Spektor - "Fidelity" - Begin to Hope

It feels so wonderful to be back, my dearest Blogland readers!  I think it was pivotal for me to step away, however, in order to realize just how much I truly needed this blog.  I don't think I'll be leaving you again anytime soon.  It's also such a relief to no longer restrict myself to one day of posting.  I think I'll quite enjoy being able to jump on here at random times and unload my thoughts.

So, I've been on a big Regina Spektor kick lately.  As I mentioned in a previous post, despite hearing her name quite frequently, I never truly bothered to check out her music until I heard a few of her tunes in the film, (500) Days of Summer.

Interestingly enough, when I read up a little about today's song on Wikipedia, I discovered that it was inspired by the film, High Fidelity; that makes total sense - I see the connection:

 "Spektor wrote the song while watching the movie High Fidelity, which is based on a book by Nick Hornby."

Speaking of films, I think I'll take myself to the movies today.  I had wanted to check out the film, Paper Towns, when it was released way back in the middle of summer, but I never got around to it.  I see that it's still playing at the local dollar theater, which just so happened to be the hottest movie theater in town when I was still in high school... It's amazing how things change over the years, huh?

I foresee a trip to the book store today, as well.  So, yesterday, I was in a meeting with an 85-year-old client who is worth over $10 million.  Clients like that typically turn my stomach and bore me to tears because most of them are so vapid and just downright tedious.  This lady was so different... inspirational even!  We got on the topic of reading once my attorney stepped out of the meeting in order to jump on a conference call.  She told me that after her husband passed away, the one true joy in life that she still held on to was reading.  She told me that she reads at least one book a day.  She enjoys nonfiction - mainly autobiographies and biographies.  I shared with her that I preferred memoirs and British fiction.  She claimed to be one of the only people who still had a library card.  I told her that was untrue because I, too, am in possession of a library card.  She didn't even believe me at first.  I had to go get it from my wallet to prove it to her.  She was so down-to-earth, and she was so sharp and witty for an 85-year-old.  I aspire to be like her when I'm that age.  She told me to never let go of my love for reading... I promised her that I wouldn't.  So, yes, I feel that a trip to the book store is in order after yesterday's encounter.

Who knows where else the day will take me... White Rock Lake, La Madeleine, Steak n' Shake (they finally opened one nearby!!), Goodwill, Target, World Market???  Oftentimes, the best thing I can do for myself in this humdrum world is just to let the day take me...

I will also include two others by Regina Spektor called "Better" and "Samson".

Until next time...

XOXOXO 
Anastasia

Shake it up

I never loved nobody fully
Always one foot on the ground
And by protecting my heart truly
I got lost
In the sounds

I hear in my mind
All of these voices
I hear in my mind
All of these words
I hear in my mind
All of this music
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my ha-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-aart
And it breaks my ha-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-aart

Suppose I never, ever met you
Suppose we never fell in love
Suppose I never ever let you
Kiss me so sweet
And so sah-ah-ah-ah-oft

Suppose I never, ever saw you
Suppose we never, ever called
Suppose I kept on singin' love songs
Just to break
My own fall
Just to break my fa-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-aall
Just to break my fa-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-aall
Just to break my fa-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-aall
Break my fall
Break my fall

All my friends say
That of course
It's gonna get be'er
Gonna get be'er
Be'er, be'er, be'er, be'er
Better, better, better, ohhh...

I never loved nobody fully
Always one foot on the ground
And by protecting my heart truly
I got lost
In the sounds

I hear in my mind
All of these voices
I hear in my mind
All of these words
I hear in my mind
All of this music
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart

I hear in my mind
All of these voices
I hear in my mind
All of these words
I hear in my mind
All of this music
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
It breaks my ha-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-aart
And it breaks my ha, ah, ah, ah, art
And it breaks my ha-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-aart
And it breaks my heart
Breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart 

Post #603: Madonna - "Crazy For You" - Vision Quest Soundtrack

My dearest Blogland readers:

I told you that I'd be back before you even had a chance to know I was gone!  As I mentioned, "goodbyes" are just not my thing... I miss people and experiences far more than is probably even healthy for me.  I suppose it's a character flaw, one of many for sure, but it's one that falls on the spectrum of the lesser of the evils and is probably why I am less hesitant to admit it.

It's a good thing I reserved the right to pick up where I left off in the near or distant future, huh?  Thank you useless legal jargon that I employ on a daily basis.

So, why the change of heart?  The first reason is that the whole writing poetry thing as a creative outlet just didn't really work out for me.  I have books and books of poetry that I wrote in my teens and early twenties, but it's just not how I choose to express myself any longer.  The second reason is that I just needed to step away.  My life had seriously become one boring monotonous waste of space and that was brought to my full attention while on vacation this past weekend.

So, I headed off to the lovely little island of Galveston, Texas, with my precious dog, Pixie.  I'm not sure why Galveston is regarded so poorly.  I consider it to be an absolute treasure.  I could even see myself happily living there.  Nevertheless, I desperately needed to pull myself out of the comfort of my environment and my routine and to do some thinking by the shoreline. 

While there, I came to the realization that sadly, at this point in my life, I'm really just going through the motions, trying to create as few ripples as possible, until I can get myself on better financial footing.  I know that kind of lifestyle is highly frowned upon by those of you who live with a "seize the day because life is too short" mentality, but I'm just not like that --- haven't been in decades.  Of course it has to do with my past.  For the love of all that is good and righteous, I am still paying dearly for mistakes that I made in my early twenties when I lived with a "seize the day because life is too short" mentality.  I've never truly had anyone to rely on.  I've been independent and self-sufficient since I obtained my first job at the age of 16.  It's deeply ingrained in me to be able to take care of myself and to depend on only me.  Whether people agree with it or not, I don't see a whole lot changing for me until I can finally put all those mistakes to rest and not drag them around with me any longer.  The good news is that the end of that burden is fully within sight.

Another realization that I came to is that I'm tired of pretending like I don't need connections and that I'm okay with being alone all the time.  I can go back to countless posts that I've made on this blog about not needing anyone and about being oh-so-independent, but it's simply not true.  Heck, I think that part of the reason I decided to begin posting again is just so that I can rekindle some type of feeling of being connected.  I guess I don't really know how to go about it in the real world.  I'm not good at connecting with others --- never really have been; so if this is the most sincere form of connection that I can sustain at the moment, well then so be it!  I think it's awesome, for instance like today, when someone conducted a Google search on "80's song hypnotize me from can't buy me love" and found their way to my blog (It's the "Certain Things Are Likely" post from Week Thirteen: Obscure 80s, in case you were wondering).  Don't worry, whomever you are, if you are reading this because it doesn't give me any detailed info other than that; it just tells me what you searched in order to make your way to my blog.  So, I suppose that, for me, this whole connection factor is about progress, not perfection, and I'll eventually make my connection somehow and someway.  Just being honest is a huge step in the right direction, maybe???

Another realization that I came to is the completely flawed idea that many people hold where they believe that drama-induced behaviors and romantic notions are somehow one in the same.  I made the mistake of turning on the television while drifting off to sleep both nights, and it was appalling how the writers of films and television programs attempted to sell this idea time and time again.  It's almost as if they're trying to brainwash people into believing that if there are not rifts and misunderstandings and complications to overcome in relationships, then it doesn't mean anything.  I don't buy into that.  I don't think relationships need to be complicated... at least not the ones in which I wish to find myself being a participant.  Life is full of so many other complications... the last thing I want is for the person I love and care about to create more!

So I could keep rambling on and on about the other realizations I made this weekend, but some are best left unspoken.  I will wrap this up by sharing that, in an effort to break some of the monotony in my life, I have decided that I am no longer going to select just one day to which I will limit or restrict my ideas and posts.  I am going to post whenever I feel moved to post.  I may post multiple times in one week, and I may go a week or two without ever posting.  You'll just have to check back periodically, I suppose.  You may have even noticed that I have started numbering my entries by posts, as opposed to weeks.

So why "Crazy For You" by Madonna?  Well, I had a 5 1/2 hour drive there (Who knew that Houston rush hour started at 3:00 p.m.???  --- not this girl, apparently!!!), and I had a 4 1/2 hour drive home, which left me ample time to scan my Sirius stations.  This tune came on the 80s on 8 while I was making my way home, and it spoke to me the most.  Yes, I could have shared any of a number of songs with you, but this is the one upon which I ultimately decided for my comeback post.

Until next time...

XOXOXO
Anastasia 

Swaying room as the music starts
Strangers making the most of the dark
Two by two their bodies become one

I see you through the smoky air
Can't you feel the weight of my stare
You're so close, but still a world away
What I'm dying to say is that

I'm crazy for you
Touch me once and you'll know it's true
I never wanted anyone like this
It's all brand new
You'll feel it in my kiss
I'm crazy for you
Crazy for you

Trying hard to control my heart
I walk over to where you are
Eye to eye, we need no words at all

Slowly now we begin to move
Every breath, I'm deeper into you
Soon we too are standing still in time
If you read my mind

You'll see I'm crazy for you
Touch me once and you'll know it's true
I never wanted anyone like this
It's all brand new
You'll feel it in my kiss
You'll feel it in my kiss

Because I'm crazy for you
Touch me once and you'll know it's true
I never wanted anyone like this
It's all brand new
You'll feel it in my kiss
I'm crazy for you
Crazy for you
Crazy for you
Crazy for you

It's all brand new
I'm crazy for you
And you know it's true
I'm crazy crazy for you

It's all brand new
I'm crazy for you
And you know it's true
Yeah, I'm crazy for you

Crazy for you baby
I'm crazy for you
Crazy for you baby

Week One Hundred and Seventy-Six: She & Him: "I Could've Been Your Girl" - Volume Three

My dearest Blogland readers:

I've never been all that great with goodbyes... ouch, wow, they seriously hurt! Did I mention ouch? However, I knew that there would come a time when I would need to bring this blog to an end. That time seems to be now. I need to seek an alternate creative outlet; I'm thinking of taking up writing poetry again --- cleanse some emotions. I need to make some serious changes in my life too; sometimes you have to learn this the hard way. I will, however, reserve the right to pick up where I left off from this point in posting in the near or distant future if I so choose.

Before I go, I would like to, first of all, thank all of you who stumbled upon my blog through the various search engines you used to find your way here. More importantly, I would like to thank those of you who took the time to comment on my posts or to email me directly --- especially my Russian friend who adored Bow Wow Wow and all my kindred spirits who remembered Xenon. Most importantly, I would like to thank those of you who came back on a weekly basis, including you, mom; it means so much to me that all of you took the time to read my random silliness.

Since I started my blog with She & Him, I figured it would be apropos to end it in the same manner.  In addition, I will include another tune for you today called "It's Not For Me To Say"... I also realize that it is Saturday and that I normally post on Sunday, but I started this blog on a Saturday; therefore, I see no reason why I shouldn't end it on one too!

In case this is goodbye...

XOXOXO
Anastasia

It doesn't matter, if I were willing
It doesn't matter that the lights are turned down low, oh oh
I know you have to go

It doesn't matter, I fought my heart
It's broke and shattered to a million and one
Undone, I guess I haven't won

'Cause I could've been your girl
And you could've been my four leaf clover
If I could do it over I'd send you the pillow that I cry on

It doesn't matter, I've just begun
And if you see me, just move on
Cause we are free and never meant to be

'Cause I could've been your girl
And you could've been my four leaf clover
If I could do it over I'd send you the pillow that I cry on

'Cause I could've been your girl
And you could've been my four leaf clover
If I could do it over I'd send you the pillow that I cry on

'Cause I could've been your girl
And you could've been my four leaf clover
If I could do it over I'd send you the pillow that I cry on  

Week One Hundred and Seventy-Five: Mazzy Star - "Fade Into You" - So Tonight That I Might See

So whilst wheel-clicking (that's right, I said wheel-clicking) through some of the playlists on my trusty, little iPod (yes, it's still alive and kicking),I came across this song and realized that I had yet to post about Mazzy Star. You may recall that I mentioned Hope Sandoval when I posted about The Jesus and Mary Chain's song, "Sometimes Always". You may even recall that Mazzy Star was part of Week Ninety-Two: Double Takes, where the song, "Disappear", appeared alongside INXS's song, "Disappear".  However, Mazzy Star has yet to receive its own posting, so that's going to officially happen today.

Whenever Mazzy Star came onto the scene in 1994, it was IMPOSSIBLE to find anything with regard to the band.  That was still considered pre-internet days in my household, and even the music magazines to which I subscribed were giving them no mention.

In fact, I thumbed through a whole stack of music magazines that are still in my possession, and I finally came across one mention of the band in the November 1996 Alternative Press, and it wasn't even all that flattering:

I've heard quite a few whiney comments about Labor Day being the end of summer, but I have to admit that I could not be more thrilled for the upcoming autumn season... it's always been my favorite. I love listening to Mazzy Star's first three albums on cold, dreary, and even drizzling days.  In addition to "Fade Into You", I'll also include my favorite off of She Hangs Brightly called "Halah", as well as my favorite from Among My Swan called "Happy"...

 I want to hold the hand inside you
I want to take a breath that's true
I look to you when I see nothing
I look to you to see the truth

You live your life
You go in shadow
You'll come apart and you'll go blind
Some kind of night into your darkness
Close your eyes with what's not there

Fade into you
Strange you never knew
Fade into you
I think it's strange you never knew

A stranger's light comes on slowly
A stranger's heart without a home
You put your hands into your head
And then smiles cover your heart

Fade into you
Strange you never knew
Fade into you
I think it's strange you never knew

Fade into you
Strange you never knew
Fade into you
I think it's strange you never knew
I think it's strange you never knew

Week One Hundred and Seventy-Four: Nate Heller - "Run to the Mountain" - The Diary of a Teenage Girl

So I treated myself to the early showing of The Diary of a Teenage Girl at The Angelika.  I had seen previews for it when I recently went to the very same theater to watch the film, Amy, and it piqued my interest and seemed right up my alley.  I'll include the trailer for you now:

I'm not sure exactly what I was expecting from the film, but it wasn't that... and by that, I mean a coming of age tale of pedophilia!  It wasn't a bad film.  There were some very touching moments (ha! and I don't mean that in a gross way!), but it was a little, ummmmm, different... I guess.

The soundtrack was fairly decent, but what really caught my attention was the tune that closed out the film and which also appears in the trailer.  I have recently been introduced to Bluegrass music, at the suggestion of a dear friend, and I've even added it to my Pandora mix.  So I've been listening to quite a few banjos lately, which is probably why today's tune caught my ear in such a manner.  Regardless, it's a sweet little song... so enjoy!

One, two, three

We can run to the mountains

We can sail the emerald sea

Drop a coin in every fountain

It comes true when I wake up

And I see you next to me

I gotta girl she's sweet as can be

All the other boys wanna be like me

And oh, isn't life sweet

Danny, isn't life sweet

Well I chased that girl around the Frisco Bay

Don't believe everything your mama say

And oh, isn't life weird

Danny, oh Danny

 We can run to the mountains

We can sail the emerald sea

Drop a coin in every fountain

It comes true when I wake up

And I see you next to me

 It comes true when I wake up

And I see you next to me

And I gotta girl she's sweet as can be

Sings like a bird, stings like a bee

And oh, isn't life sweet 

Danny, isn't life sweet

Well that girl chased me

And I ran away

Shoulda believed what your mama say

And oh, isn't life weird

Danny, isn't life weird, Danny

We can run to the mountains

We can sail the emerald sea

Drop a coin in every fountain

It comes true when I wake up

And I see you next to me

 It comes true when I wake up

And I see you next to me

It comes true when I wake up

And I see you next to me

Week One Hundred and Seventy-Three: Foo Fighters - "Big Me" - Foo Fighters

I always seem to find it a bit bizarre when clients insist on bringing their children with them to the meetings where they are signing their estate planning documents. I fully understand that babysitters are not cheap nor are they easy to come by these days; however, we do have a lovely little lobby with nice, comfy couches and an even nicer receptionist who would be more than happy to keep an eye on the kiddos.  Surely they know that the main topic of conversation is death - namely their own death; still some clients insist on having their children in the room with them.

Case in point, this past week, some clients brought their 15-year-old son.  It was fascinating to watch this kid's facial expressions throughout the course of the explanation of the documents.  The best one was the sly little smile when he realized how much he stood to inherit after both of his parents passed.  It kind of made me want to warn the parents that they might need to start sleeping with one eye open.

So how does the band, Foo Fighters, fit into this tale? Well, he just so happened to be wearing a Foo Fighters shirt.  Now, the best look on the kid's face was when I asked him if he was a fan of Nirvana too.  I thought he was going to fall out of the over-stuffed conference chair in which he was rocking back and forth.  

Okay, I get it though. I'm not sure that, at his age, I would have expected an older person decked out in a business suit to ask me about my favorite bands either; however, he humored me with small talk about the Foo Fighters, and I humored him with small talk about Nirvana. Plus, my boss loves it when I keep the clients (and their kid, in this instance) entertained while he gives everything a final once over, and I'd much rather converse about music than, oh say, their latest doctor's appointment results or their ungrateful grandchildren or whatever other topics I'm often forced to endure.  So it was quite refreshing, much like Mentos --- if you haven't seen the video for "Big Me", you'll understand that reference in a minute.

I realized that I had not yet made a post about the Foo Fighters; so today, I have selected my two favorites by them, "Big Me" and "Everlong"... enjoy!    

When I talk about it
Carries on
Reasons only knew
When I talk about it
Aries or
Treasons all renew

Big me to talk about it
I could stand to prove
If we can get around it
I know that it's true

When I talked about it
Carried on
Reasons only knew
But it's you
I fell into

When I talked about it
Carries on
Reasons only knew
When I talk about it
Aries or
Treasons all renew

Big me to talk about it
I could stand to prove
If we can get around it
I know that it's true

Well I talked about it
Put it on
Never was it true
But it's you
I fell into

Well I talked about it
Put it on
Never was it true
But it's you
I fell into
I fell into
I fell into  

 

Week One Hundred and Seventy-Two: Collective Soul - "The World I Know" - Collective Soul

This song has been showing up quite frequently on my Pandora mix lately, and I really have taken a liking to it. I was not particularly fond of Collective Soul when they first hit the scene in the early '90s with their single, "Shine". However, it seems like as I get older, some of the bands and songs that I snubbed in my youth have become some of my new found favorites.

I read about the video concept on Wikipedia, and I felt that it was worth sharing with you:
 
"The music video depicts a businessman who begins to go about his day, reading The New York Times on the way to his office. As he reads about death and sees the homelessness and sadness on the street, he becomes disillusioned with his life and prepares to commit suicide. As he climbs to the roof of a nearby building, he takes off his shoes and looks at the ground crying. He stretches out his arms and readies himself to fall.

However, just as he is about to fall, a pigeon lands on his arm. He feeds it with the bagel in his pocket, and the crumbs attract ants, which makes the man notice the similarities of them to the people walking below. He laughs throwing all his money at the people and pulls himself out of his state.

During the entire video, periodic cuts to singer Ed Roland looking on at the man while singing the song are shown.

The video also shows sadness and happiness in the form of color hues for the video. While the man is disillusioned with his life and is thinking about suicide, the video is in a blue and purple tint, giving a dark feeling to the video. When the pigeon lands on the man's arm, the video's hue changes to show the normal colors of the city, also revealing the sun shining over the city, showing of the sudden change to happiness and relief."

I think we all become disillusioned with life at times... I know that I sure do. However, when times get a little dark and a little more trying than others, it always seems like something happens to remind me that there is still good in the world.

This weekend, I got to be a part of many inspiring events. To start off, on Friday, I got to watch a group of people from all different walks of life and backgrounds come together to meet one another and offer support to one another as they all begin a new journey and a major undertaking in their lives. Then to end the weekend, I got to attend a ceremony to celebrate their official start tomorrow. At the ceremony, as I was listening to the speakers, one, in particular, really struck a chord with me.

You see, when I was teaching, I really felt like I was making a difference and leaving an impact on the world. I felt assured that I was working towards a greater good. In my new career, I haven't ever really felt that same warm, fuzzy feeling about the work I am doing. However, as I listened to this particular individual speak about his experiences in the field in which I work, I realized that I am helping people more than I realized. I suppose that I have been looking at things in more of a "blue and purple tint" like the beginning of today's video. Listening to him made me see my work in more "normal colors". I still think I was contributing more to the world as a teacher, but I was given the gift of a different perspective on my current career this evening.

I'll quit rambling now, and I'll let you get to the video and lyrics. I'll also include two other favorites called "Run" and "Heavy"...

Has our conscience shown?
Has the sweet breeze blown?
Has all kindness gone?
Hope still lingers on

I drink myself a new found pity
Sittin' alone in New York City
And I don't know why

Are we listening
To hymns of offering
Have we eyes to see?
Love is gathering

All the words that I've been reading
Have started the act of bleeding
Into one
Into one

So I walk up on high
And I step to the edge
To see my world below
And I laugh at myself
As the tears roll down
'Cause it's the world I know
Oh, it's the world I know

I drink myself a new found pity
Sittin' alone in New York City
And I don't know why
I don't know why

So I walk up on high
And I step to the edge
To see my world below
And I laugh at myself
As the tears roll down
'Cause it's the world I know
Oh, it's the world I know

Yeah I walk up on high
And I step to the edge
To see my world below
And I laugh at myself
While the tears roll down
'Cause it's the world I know
Oh, it's the world I know